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Recent Entries

What About All This Stuff?

Thursday, January 12, 2012

It's that time of year to find a place in our homes and closets for the gifts we received or purchased over the holidays. That usually requires making space by cleaning out and giving away other things. But for some 1 to 2 percent of the U.S. population who suffers from compulsive hoarding syndrome this is an impossible task.

New Take on New Year's Resolutions!

Monday, December 26, 2011

Have you made your New Year's Resolutions? How many are from last year? According to Tom Connellan, author of "The 1 Percent Solution: How to Make Your Next 30 Days the Best Ever" just one week into January, 25 percent of New Year's resolutions are nothing more than a memory. The prospects for keeping a resolution throughout the year are even more bleak, Connellan says and he estimates that by the time we ring in 2013, 88 percent of New Year's resolutions will have been broken.

Finding a Way out of Emotional Abuse

Tuesday, December 06, 2011

In her breakthrough book, The Emotionally Abusive Relationship, Beverly Engel, one of the worldds leading experts on the subject of 'emotional abuse' defines what it is and what to do about it.

MOST RECENT ENTRY: Strengthening Marriage with Assertiveness

by Dr. Mike Atwater - Thursday, February 02, 2012

“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.” – Dr. Suess

There are countless workshops, magazine articles, discussions and movies about dating, love and marriage. So what is necessary to have healthy relationships or a loving marriage? In his article, Couples Relationships: Acceptance, Assertiveness and Accommodation, Daniel Bochner, PhD outlines and describes what he calls the foundations of a healthy marriage:  

The three “A”s, acceptance, accommodation and assertiveness, are the hallmarks of a good relationship. If partners are to turn the natural chemistry of their initial relationship into an enduring love, they must accept one another’s differences, accommodate one another’s preferences, and assert their own preferences where important.”

Assertiveness is often the most misunderstood and hardest to attain because it requires we know ourselves and our feelings and beliefs so that we can communicate naturally and in a healthy way while respecting the right of others who have a different opinion or viewpoint. “Studies show that assertive communication can help build personal confidence, assist with managing stress and anger, and improve coping skills for emotional health and well-being,” says psychologist Sari Shepphird. “Assertive communication is the perfect midpoint between aggressiveness and passivity — you avoid needlessly hurting others, yet you are sure to see results.”

In his book, Speaking the Truth in Love : A Christian Approach to Assertiveness, Henry Virkler, PhD provides practical guidelines for clinicians working from a Christian perspective with ways to assist their clients on assertiveness and boundary issues. Some assertiveness books wrestle with the biblical perspective and encourage clients to be assertive but never get to the behavioral steps to take for success. This book lays out those steps while addressing the cognitive-thinking and self-talk changes, which must occur for clients who want to go from a passive lifestyle to a more assertive lifestyle. By working affirmation into assertiveness, the text helps clinicians be assertive without being aggressive. This book also attempts to reconcile assertiveness with biblical concepts such as submitting to one another, turning the other cheek, humility and serving one another.

See the continuing education course based on Virkler’s book here at The course helps Mental Health Professionals fulfill CE credits and is available for Psychologists, LCSW, LPC, LMFT, LMHC, LSSP and more: approved by APA, ASWB, NBCC, NAADAC and most states for School Psychology.


Related Courses:

  Title Credits
2408925 Speaking the Truth in Love: A Christian Approach to Assertiveness
by Henry Virkler, PhD


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